The Star

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Far, far more distant than Venus, its light not reaching us for uncountable years… Crowley’s card brings it close, almost immanent, associates it with that planet so close to us… He did not understand intergalactic distances as we do, but still, he might have understood something of the speed of light, the immensity of space… What would he have thought of the James Webb Space Telescope? Of all those galaxies packed with stars, themselves packed into a picture of a slice of our night sky no bigger than a grain of sand held at arm’s length.

I think of how I associate The Star with MIRIAM – “Moving Inspiration Rapidly Into Accepting Minds” – my reverse-tongue-in-cheek acronym, turning a stupid racist joke from my home state I won’t even repeat here into an expansion of starry influence to describe my recent spiritual awakening or near-awakening – I think of how I associate The Star with MIRIAM, and how this inspirational feminine-feeling force seems to guide me to revelations, but also how those revelations take me on strange loops that amaze me with what I’m seeing, but then don’t take me to new mathematical answers … or haven’t, yet.

Maybe it’s just a matter of waiting the mind-boggling length of time it would take for those photons to get from those stars in those galaxies all the way to James Webb.

I want to be there when they arrive… but will there even be a there, there by that time?

Strangely, The Star now seems the perfect symbol of the kind of hope I need to cultivate with my Integer Factorization Study, and the fact that I’m a 65-year-old man with a small state college Bachelor of Arts degree in mathematics, trying to crack the code on which they based the RSA Challenge.

Who am I kidding?

Nobody, if this crazy inspirational energy actually leads me to an answer.

I’m not kidding.

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